During this rather amusing, yet heated, debate she came up with some key issues that blight her life.
As as become the norm, I have constructed a list of the most annoying things that I do (according to my wife, anyway). Are you guilty of any of these crimes against your beloved spouse?
1) Painting Clutter in Lounge
Wife's Comment: Where is my phone? That table is supposed to be for the internet router and the cordless telephone, not your miniature's crap! You make more mess than the two year old!
2) Reading material in the toilet
Wife's Comment: For God's sake shift those books and old magazines, I am sick of seeing them. I going to stuff them in a black rubbish bag if they are still there tonight! How I am supposed to get to my bathroom scales if they're buried under all that crap!
3) Clothes badly hung (or on floor) but magazines perfectly stacked and well cared for.
I don't think the logic here really needs to be explained. Priorities are just that, after all. Fact is (but don't tell her) the value of the collection of old mags, books and miniatures is so vast that she could happily spend £100s if not £1000s of pounds on clothes and make up if you sold it!
Like you'd do that though, eh?
Wife's Comment: Pick up those bloody shirts off the floor! I spend ages doing the washing and all you do is dump it in that cupboard. If you shifted all that Warhammer crap out of there you'd have more space and you wouldn't have to cram everything inside!
4) Jam jars full of soaking miniatures
Wife's Comment: How many times do I have to tell you that the kitchen is not for all this crap! What happens if one of the children pick up one of the jars and drinks it? And while we're talking about it, what is with all the bloody bases, toothbrushes and smelly glues?
Oh, is that araldite? Could you just fix my broken vase with that please!
5) Malign influence over children
Wife's Comment: He'll have nightmares looking at those awful pictures! That book is so unsuitable! If he likes 'little men' when he grows up I'll lock the pair of you in the garden shed!
6) No one can eat on the dinning room table
The warm hum of the scanner as it saves another classic Warhammer title as a sweet pdf ready to share with enthusiasts the world over. The quality printer and scanner combo (homemade by me) and, of course, the stand of literature ready for the 'next blog'. This is our lounge table in all its glory!
Wife's Comment: This first thing I see when I walked into this room is your mess! Why do we have to have the scanner out all of the time? What is with these piles of magazines that are nearly 30 years old!? Where can I eat my slimming world meal in peace? Tidy it up, this second!
7) Endless parcels and packages delivered every morning
Wife's Comment: Its so embarrassing when I have my mothers' coffee afternoons and there is a huge pile of parcels sitting there. They always say, 'he's been on eBay again, hasn't he?' And there's the postman, knocking on the door and getting me to sign all these orange pieces of paper not to mention all these red cards with 'I'm sorry but we missed you' written on them! When will it stop!?
So, its confession time! How many of these are you guilty of? Or, perhaps, you inflict additional spousal crimes with you passion for retro Warhammer and fantasy games?